August 30, 2012

Some News is Weird

So I saw this headline today...
"Body parts found in auctioned Florida storage unit"

Umm... what? Thanks for creeping me out, CNN. And Florida? What's going on there?

I feel bad for whoever spent money on that storage unit hoping to find something good it in. Although, they may have found something good if they were hoping for body parts. If they were, they got lucky. Because who expects to find body parts in a storage unit? Besides the guy who owned it, obviously. Clean that shit out, dude. This would make for a good episode of CSI or something.

The weird thing is the guy that owned the storage unit used to do autopsies at a funeral home. Did people not notice limbs were missing or was he just really good at hiding it? Unless they were going to be cremated, in which case no one would notice anyway. Who would look at the ashes and say "I thought there would be more?" Nobody, that's who.

Either way the guy is creepy. All I know is, when I die I'd better not have parts taken off (or out) of me that I had when I died. I don't care if I'm dead, you can't cut off my arm or I will haunt you. I'll hide your keys and short sheet your bed and stuff. Don't mess with me... I'd be a scary ghost.


  1. LMBO---You are so freaking funny! You really need to do this for a living. You are WAY better and far more interesting than Perez Hilton, for sure.