July 18, 2012

Rules Upon Death

I was watching the video of a Youtuber that I really like today and she had a video about what she wanted at her funeral for whenever it is that she dies.

She makes a good point about wanting her funeral to be a celebration of life rather than having everyone be sad about her death. I agree with that and because I won't be making a vlog (I write so no one can see me- I'm shy) so I'm writing it down. *By writing this I'm not planning on going anywhere anytime soon, but you never know what is going to happen to you. Just being prepared.*

1. Bouncy houses. There had better be at least one. They are fun and if you want to come to my funeral you had better comply... unless you are physically unable obviously. I'm not going to make someone really old or in a wheelchair bounce around in there. They could break something! Come on guys, I'm not heartless.

2. No flowers. They're pretty but they would fade and die and would be a sad reminder of the brief time we have. I would say balloons but I want to avoid pollution. I don't need to help kill the earth because I'm dead. So... maybe plant some flowers or trees instead? Obviously not on my grave though. I don't need to be squashed by tree roots, thanks. OK, and maybe balloons too.

3. No black or grey clothes. It looks too boring and sad. Happy colors, people!

4. Good food. Don't serve boring sandwiches. I love food so nothing boring or plain! Corn dogs are the exception. Corn dogs are delicious.

5. Dessert. Cake & ice cream- I love them.

6. No sad music. Seriously.

7. Funny stories must be told. They don't even have to involve me. I just want people to laugh. Make fun of me if you want, I won't care. If no one can come up with something funny I'll force everyone to listen to comedy tracks. Deal with it.

8. Bouncy houses. They're important, so don't forget.

9. Are rides too much to ask for? Maybe a petting zoo? Oh and balloon animals! This funeral is getting pricey.

My funeral is starting to sound more like a carnival. Can we have a funeral at a carnival? Plan A- carnival funeral, Plan B- regular happy funeral with bouncy houses.

I forgot about the carnies; the only downside to a carnival funeral. Well, carnies and poop from the petting zoo. I wouldn't invite them (carnies... animals are obviously allowed) but they would have to be there to run the rides... so they're OK I guess. But no clowns... OK, clowns too as long as they can make balloon animals.

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